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Wednesday, 21 March 2012

Why Does It Take So Long?

The first time we got asked to have our son assessed for autism was when he was 13 years old.

He had just moved up to secondary school.

His first day at school seemed to be fine.

Then his world came crashing down.

He was getting ready for school and as the time for him to leave got closer he became more anxious.

The moment drew closer and he just couldn't walk out of the door. Tears rolled down his face and panic appeared in his face.

On that day we spent hours trying to get him to school without any luck.

This carried on for months the tears, the panic and the anxiety.

We would take him to the school and as soon as we walked into the school gates the panic would start all over again.

We were meant to hand him over to one of the teachers there but he would work himself up and the teacher would just turn round and say,

"If you can't get him in school then we are going to send you to court."

We had done everything we could and the stress this was causing us was unbelievable.

The school even got a psychologist involved and he was the one who asked for him to be assessed.

We had no clue how to do this he told us to go to the doctor and they would get the ball rolling.

We saw the specialist once and he didn't say much. Our son was put on a list.

The school had to fill out forms that the specialist had sent them. There was a delay.

I was left to chase them up myself.

Even then the school continued to threaten us with court action.

Because our son still found it hard getting himself into school.

Last year we finally got our appointment for him to be tested.

The specialist sent out another form for the school to fill out and can you believe it when the time came for the specialist to come around and see us the school still hadn't fill out their part of the assessment.

Thankfully the assessment went ahead.

I was asked once again to chase up the form with the school and after numerous phone calls they eventually sent off the form.

And then we got the results. Our son has autism.

It total it has taken 3 years.

3 years of the school causing a lot of stress.

3 years of court threats.

My question is WHY DOES IT TAKE SO LONG?

And why is there no help for the children and parents who have to go through this slow and distressing process.

Here is a little more about Lisa this weeks guest post blogger

I'm a mum of 3 wonderful children

J is 18 this year and I can't believe how fast he's growing up.

S is 16 and has autism he's a great lad. He's the most kindest lad you will ever meet

H is 5 the only girl in the family she is also being home schooled.

My blog address is

Sunday, 18 March 2012

Dear Mum.......

Dear Mum.........

I wanted to say thank you to you for taking care of me, loving me and being there for me today and always.

Your love is so strong. You unwavering encouragement and support is amazing.

I also want to say thank you for all the things I have inherited from you...chubby knees and deafness included!!

Much love to you on this your special day.

These photographs were taken yesterday. We had our celebration for Mother's Day then. We went out for a wonderful lunch, we walked, laughed, tried on fascinators and enjoyed each other so very much. I love you Mum.

This post has been written in loving memory of my father who died 3 years ago. He would be very happy to read these wonderful words about my mum.

Monday, 12 March 2012

Dear reader ...

Dear ….

How is it because someone has a physical disability we are more sympathetic despite whatever it might be.

Now when it comes to mental disability why do people judge so quickly. How can they possibly know what is wrong with a person just by looking at him? I have heard this so many times regarding my children.

That’s a naughty child you’ve got there!

“Well no actually, they’re not naughty they are disabled”. Is my reply.

Then you get the absolute classic line…

“Well they look all right to me.”

Since when did you become a doctor?

I do wish I could pluck up the courage to say this.

There are actually different from you and me they see the world differently they are not naughty they have a hidden disability called Autism.

Let me show you a brief glimpse of life with Autism, in the form of a letter to show you what ignorance my children face day in day out.

Dear ...

When I go out why do you stare, am I not like you. I have 2 arms, 2 legs and most of all I have feelings but you don’t understand that. You look at me as if I am some sort of alien. Do you know your stares upset me? I ask my mummy what is wrong with me, why do they look? I can’t help the fact I scream, I do that because I am upset, scared and I don’t know what to do.

I can’t portray my feelings like you, it's the way my brain is wired. I see the world differently and sometimes I don’t understand it, it doesn’t make sense to me but somehow I cope in your world. In my world everyone is happy and no one is sad. Everything that people say I take literally, so if you say to me ”hold on a minute”, I think you have to hold a minute. When you talk to me I have all this noise going on around me, sometimes it sounds like so many people are talking to me at once. I can’t hear your voice, it gets lost in the sea of noise.

I flap and jump because I can’t control the way I am feeling its like a sensory high voltage overload it sends my body into doing things that I can’t help. I don’t know what excitement is so I portray this in different ways, I start spinning, jumping, etc. When I hit you , I don’t mean it I get an emotion that I can’t explain and the only way I can express it is by hitting out usually at you.
I don’t understand love but I know that you mean a lot to me, I give you cuddles to make it all better, it works when you do it for me, so it will work for me to make you happy. I don’t like when my world changes I like things to stay the same .
I do try to fit in your world but sometimes its not easy please understand that I am different.

My guest post blogger is Wendy. Wendy is the mum behind the Savette Gazette. Her aim is to share her experiences as a mum of 3 children who are autistic

The Savette Gazette allows you access to a personal insight of how this family deal with everyday problems and how they can overcome them.The Savette Gazette allows you to share in their battles and triumphs that they encounter along the way.

A bit about Wendy, she is married with 4 children.

Ely is 11 years old.

Luke is 7 years old and Autistic, global development delay hyper-mobility and a chromosome 16 abnormality and he attends a special school.

Jen is 5 years old and has Autistic traits , global development delay and a chromosome 16 abnormality she attends a main stream school.

Little Gnome is 2 years old and has just been recently diagnosed as autistic and is also disabled. He is unable to walk to talk lives very much in his world.

Wendy's aim is to make people more aware of additional needs and autism and to show that the condition is just part of the person. Through this process she make friends and share ideas along the way.

As well as a Blogger she is also a product reviewer.